The old eight glasses of water

The old eight glasses of water a day adage is one of those things that has generally been accepted as fact. I've certainly come across it in numerous publications or on television presented as gospel. Not that anyone who's ever earnestly exhorted their fellow human beings to glug, glug, glug to this extent has ever once quoted a scientific study supporting this quantity as recommended intake...probably because there isn't one. I know no better than you where the eight glasses measurement came from; maybe someone just thought it was a nice even number, who knows? But it's always struck me as excessive. Especially since I grew out of my Dolly magazine phase.

Back in the days when I believed Dolly magazine to be the oracle of all things cool and sophisticated, i.e. the conduit through which I might attain womanly perfection (the 14-year-old version - the one with Johnny Depp escorting me to the movies, he in a waistcoat, white T-shirt and jeans, me in a hot pink tulle bubble skirt) I pretty much believed any old rubbish they printed in it including the classic "your skin and hair will be beautiful if you drink eight glasses of water a day but just in case that doesn't work here's an ad for Clearasil" ruse.

So I gave it a good honest try. Eight glasses of water a day? Not a problem. Easy peasy lemon squeezy. I mean, if it was the best way to great skin and hair and was free then why the hell wouldn't you? You know, just in case J. Depp esquire ever plucked up the courage to ask you out, you'd want to be looking your best, wouldn't you?

I lasted two days. I can't say that it did anything for my complexion but by the end of the weekend my "unzip and sit" action had never been smoother. Even staggering the eight glasses over the day and not drinking any other liquids, it still seemed as if I spent 70 per cent of my time going to or coming back from having a wee. The remaining 30 per cent was spent on the actual weeing.